Sunday, December 27, 2015

Survival Tips for Free Spirits



We, as free spirits, try following the dictates of society sometimes only to spend our days walking through life on burning hot coals. We've witnessed our parents walking on them, our teachers, neighbors, bosses, colleagues and even friends all walking through life with scorched souls (soles) leaping from one painful red, hot ember to another while silently wondering, "is it them, or is it me?" - and being even further perplexed when told how necessary and enjoyable it is to step this way through our days.

We, in contrast, prefer moving through life like a warm summer breeze, navigating uniquely through and around the open surroundings of our lives, but instead we frequently find ourselves seeking an open window inside the hermetically sealed buildings where we have come to reside. We seek to be free only to discover a teeny tiny crack in the only window available in the factory complex that has come to define us. How, we ask, can we escape through that, the only opening?


How we cope...

1. We go along with a life of walking on hot coals while taking prozac, zoloft, and klonapin to numb the pain.
2. We recite affirmations hoping to believe hot coals are no different than ice cubes.
3. We try varying forms of alternate realities. Do I need to explain?
4. We transform from a summer breeze into a raging typhoon and find ourselves without friends or family.




Raise your hand if you've tried them all? 







Well, free spirits, I don't claim to have it all figured out, but here's what I've learned about surviving with your spirit mostly in tact: 

1. Free spirits just by their nature bring oxygen to closed and stuffy environments. Others can't initially appreciate the breath of fresh air that we are because we remind them of their containment. It's not personal or even conscious. They just aren't ready to break free. The only way they can handle us is to make us conform to their confinement. It's the only way they know. In these instances (of which there will be many) reflect on and remember who you are and what you bring to any environment and patiently step back and allow your magic time to gently penetrate the resistance.

2. Is freedom external or internal? Free spirits over time learn to seek freedom from within. It lies in the choices we have in responding to life rather than being able to do whatever we want whenever we want.

3. Free spirits feel trapped by external rigidity. We may feel a desperate need to flee situations devoid of creativity, air and light and do so impulsively. I believe a good rule of thumb, however, is not to be overtaken by the need to flee. Leave when you need to but on your terms. Leave only when YOU are ready and when it makes sense. 

4. Free spirits recognize that solitude has healing powers. Sometimes as free spirits we need to prioritize solitude over time commitments and even certain friendships and relationships that can't and ultimately don't offer us the degree of growth and joy we can attain from solitude.

5. For free spirits, the attainment of status and money are generally not high priorities. Free spirits struggle with this as society overall has different priorities in mind. For the sake of our spirits we may need to trade time for the attainment of material wealth. Time to pursue what is meaningful to us is a prized commodity. We need to accept that trade off and claim it for our well-being.

There you have it, free spirits. I hope this has helped. Leave a comment to let me if this resonates; or add any additional strategies that have worked for you.